One Orkut Scrap and I was Stoned

Posted: April 10, 2011 in Days at DCE, My Life

Today I’m again sitting alone in my cubicle, Sunday night, among those few loners in office… and i dread being alone, I don’t know why but whenever I’m alone i began to think over either about someone else’s actions or for my own, lot of things from past haunt me, promises, betrayals, friendship, I began to miss my home more and more…
And today it is different, I’m just recollecting all the instances when people had their judgement for me… When they decide to hate me, they began evaluating my actions, they began to interpret my actions with their own perception of good and bad..
There was this guy with me in graduation, was like a very good friend, used to ask me to download a lot of movies for him.. the one who till the last few days always kept on asking whether i had downloaded the latest roadies episode in HD… It was sometime during third year, the dying days of orkut, accidentally i was looking at his latest scraps, and someone had asked about me “Hey ******** who’s this guy with who you are always fighting on slapster… ??” and he had replied “huh..he, he’s kinda bete noire.. He hates me and i hate him” and i was like… wow!! one scrap and I’m stoned dude… I don’t know why he thought that way, neither did i tried to ask him, i simply distanced myself… but still it haunts me… i don know which of my actions provoked him to retaliate in that way.
What more i had even been cursed “You’ll never get true love in your life”, Well i still dread that this shouldn’t come true… thank Goodness, the people now-a-days lack the sanity of the so called ‘Satyuga’ when they could burn you to flames with such kind of curses..

I’ve always argued that people should refrain from making a decision on the part of other people, who the hell just gave them the right to decide what i meant when i shared a joke, or when i teased them for not shaving since a week.. yes I’m not one of those cheesy talkers who always thinks before they spit it out, i just say it whatever i want to say… whenever want to say…
And there are countless number of things where i was quoted out of context… yes i was not supporting this ‘Save DCE’ bullshit… (yes you can come and argue any day, I’ve got more that enough reasons why i didn’t). Still remember when me and aayush were against boycotting the mid sems… and we were arguing with the rest of the morons why we shouldn’t boycott it (well what’s the aftermath… its stil DTU and to hell with the boycotters, everyone came to give exmas the next time). Well whatever i don give a damn to DCE or DTU anymore, but agin on that incident it was said that i want to give exams just because i don’t want my Microsoft joining to be deferred.. damn you all..!!
And not just that you tell someone about the bug in their system “haan we know you have research papers, ab tashan mat maar”

Not just in college, even before that in school, and even now at my workplace, often i’m branded something, a brat, some arrogant chap, atta boy. There was this girl, we were always competing to top the class, and we started off as friends for some time, and slowly drifted away, again because i was considered pompous and arrogant… I don’t know whats wrong with me.. or whats wrong with them. maybe this happens with everybody  but I’ve never talked to anyone about it. I never try to hurt or mock anyone, but I’ve even been accused of that. Even the people I haven’t met for like 10 years judge me for what ? things a 12 year old used to do. .
Yes i might have my own theories about democracy, love, reservation issue… who doesn’t, yeah one more incident… we were five people in that TBC presentation when we gave that presentation against reservation in education, everything was based on the data we provided, and still out of us five that stupid girl blamed only me for “hurting her sentiment” and held me responsible for the reason she cried… wow.. another jewel in my already doomed crown..
Maybe it works the same way for everybody and I don fit in well here.. or may be i’m that clown in the pack of cards that you can mark as any other card after you lose it.
May be I’m too ignorant to my actions, which i doubt I’m not, or may be people are too stupid and senseless to know the real me… Well no matter how much i say and write here that i don give a shit or who cares… Still I do care, yes it does hurt me to be judged as something/someone which I’m not.

  1. arpit says:

    the moment I read, you didn’t support SAVE DCE, I liked the post.

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